every step forward, i choose to walk alone.
making my own adventure, i plan the trail down to each degree on the compass.
there is no need for a map.
i know exactly where i will always end up.
every step forward, i am aware.
of myself.
until something stops me in my tracks.
a spot of deep blue hidden amongst the fading greens.
it's electric. it's stunning. my forward thinking fades.
pushing the branches back is harder than i think as i begin to explore the unmanned trail.
the unbeaten path fights against me. i am torn, but not willing to go back.
every step forward is a mystery, still alone.
allowing the sparkling new color to tempt me forward, no longer my own adventure.
there is a unspoken need to move deeper.
and then i finally reach it.
a blue lagoon.
it is cold and inviting. a place to rest and rehydrate just when i needed it most.
this is against my rules but i can't wait to jump in.
not taking the time to think i see that
my reflection is mirrored in the deep undertones of the cool, calm, and collected water.
i have yet to see the rocks hidden beneath.
i slowly undress, careful to keep all of my things together.
i am so weary, i think not of the depth.
i selfishly make the plunge quick and unconsciously.
relief is instantaneously. as well as the pain.
the shock of the bottom hits.
my legs fall from under me.
broken and bleeding.
i am still alone. but this time unable to move forward.
